Schedule What Matters

In times of uncertainty knowing what we can count on becomes even more important than ever before.  Creating a schedule for what matters is all it takes to establish more routine, more predictability, more expectation and more success.

We can work backwards.  What would you like to say that you accomplished at the end of the day?  Some of my must haves are exercise, tracking food, meditating, eating quality meals, drinking water, organizing in my house, finding a calmer mindset, practicing a gratitude attitude. 

I can say that if the whole day goes by and I haven't done these basic things, I will not be happy about how I spent (wasted) my time.  I also don't have to have every moment be significant.  Yes, it is possible to let loose and just "waste time" watching a silly tv show.  Letting off some steam is enormously stress relieving t in uncertainty. 

Today I asked some members what it is that they are happy about.  I heard about time with family, creating a pretend commute to get outside before working, connecting with friends online, having a kitty cat to cuddle....  These things are basic, cost nothing but have the power to mean everything.

This week, create your TO DO list with the positive intention of taking good care of your whole self, i.e. your mind, your body, your heart.  Prioritize what matters most to you, and make sure that gets done so that when you go to bed, you know you showed up for yourself and what matters the most to you. 

UPside Down

Since my last post, the world seems to have turned upside down.  Not knowing what the new world order is and not being able to congregate in real shared spaces to make sense of things is creating an abundance of anxiety and stress.  How could it not.

When the world turns upside down, it is our job, yours and mine, not to resist but to find a way to flow and go with it.  That doesn't mean we have to like it.  It just means that we surrender to the moment, because the moment cannot be anything other than what it is.  Furthermore, this moment is our lives.  Precious still.  One day, this will be our shared memory. 

Instead of battling in your mind, your body, your sleep, your frustration, I suggest you seek out more happiness, more stress relieving activities and more joy in simple rituals or routines.  I suggest you acknowledge your feelings of frustration or anxiety.  That's real, but know that everyone else who is taking c19 seriously is in the very same boat.  None of us knows how to behave as we shelter in place or self isolate or keep our germs at our house. 

Here is a list of many repeated suggestions:

Set a schedule.  Meditate.  Read books.  Play the piano.  Clean out clutter.  Organize closets.  Reject the temptation to ingest every piece of information from every media outlet.  Don't give in to boredom or stress eating.  Drink a lot of water.  Schedule snacks.  Get outside even in the rain.  ...  Pray that this too shall pass.  And it will. 

I have been posting on Instagram a 19 days of covid calm mini 3 breath meditation and some thoughts.  Follow me there:  Karen Astromsky

I have gotten requests to get my yoga/qi gong you tube subscription up and running--and stay tuned--it's coming....  a gift from the times.

Be Kind--To Yourself First

Nobody is perfect.  Not even you on your best day.  We are all human, and we are all capable of falling down from time to time--even when it comes to things we really want.  Consider weight loss or exercise, for example.  We want it to happen, but that isn't always enough to make it happen, and it certainly isn't enough to keep it up over time.  Life gets in the way.  Sometimes our own self defeating thoughts get in the way.

Having an all or nothing standard of perfection is one of the biggest road blocks that actually keeps us from getting what we want.   When we set ourselves up for something that no human being could achieve, and we stick to that goal despite temporary setbacks or new information along the way, we make life more difficult than it needs to be.  We deny our own humanness and create our own disappointment. 

Life doesn't need to be like this.  We can challenge that black and white thinking and notice that we don't expect others to behave like robots--perfection or nothing.  We can identify where those impossible standards might have come from and dismiss them.  We can check in on a regular basis with the voice in our heads that sends us unhelpful messages.  We can consider what we would say to a friend?  We can simply choose to begin again.  DO OVER, and let go of the past.

This is a critical skill--practicing self compassion, which simply means that you are kind to yourself in thoughts, words, actions.  You value yourself enough to work on this.  This is not to say that you let yourself off the hook.  Oh--tomorrow is another day--I'll get on track later.  That's not self compassion.  That's wishful thinking.  Self compassion is present moment awareness that kindness starts now.  You accept the fact that you aren't perfect, and you accept that others aren't either.  By doing this, you have broken down those imaginary road blocks that you don't need to get over or through.  You can navigate more easily, with the flow of things.  You can recover and reevaluate your progress with kinder eyes.  You can refrain from judging yourself harshly by an impossible standard.  You can increase your self esteem.  And then, you can pick yourself up, dust yourself off and keep going.

Consistency --A Treasured Thing

I used to watch the Today Show many years ago.  This was back in the day when Jane Pauley and Bryant Gumble were the anchors.  I also remember the episode when Jane was leaving the show, and I recall Bryant leaning over to hold her hand, and he said "consistency--a treasured thing."  It is true in relationships--personal and professional.  We know what to expect, and we can rely on that expectation to set the tone.  It is comfortable.

The same is true when it comes to cultivating a healthy lifestyle.  Consistency pays off because we know what we are supposed to be doing, and we know the benefits that will come from it.  Consider regular meal times.  If you eat at regular intervals (every three to four hours) you know that you have something to look forward to.  You know if you can hang on a little bit longer because dinner is almost here.  Alternatively, if you have just eaten, you know that you probably aren't physically hungry and shouldn't be trolling the cabinets.  You might be emotionally hungry or boredom hungry or maybe your meal was insufficient. 

When it comes to habits like exercise or meditation or taking a brain break from your desk, consistency is just as important.  It provides the framework to schedule the day.  It gives you breathing space to let off steam and regroup at regular intervals.  This reduces pressure and increases productivity. 

Another great benefit of practicing consistency is that your goals are more likely to be achieved.  You stick to your plan.  You don't deviate because you let yourself get talked out of going to the gym after work.  Instead, you go to the gym and plan happy hour on a different day.  This serves you well because your consistency at the gym has big benefits.  Feeling better physically.  Feeling accomplished.  Sleeping better.

This week, practice being consistent with your eating, your exercise, your meditation, your gratitude attitude, your dog walking. 

Consistency--a treasured thing--and so are you.