Physical clutter, visual clutter, emotional clutter--they all take a heavy toll on our lives. These things literally weigh us down because we become frustrated and overwhelmed at the sight of "stuff" that we may not need, don't know what to do with, can't bear to part with. We become upset when we have emotionally challenging thoughts occupying too much space in our brain to cope with the tasks of daily life. In the end, all of these obstacles both real and imagined make life more difficult and can lead us to feel helpless.
We are not our possessions. Yes, we care about maintaining a comfortable home, but we are not our furniture or our housewares or our kitchen appliances. We care about having clothing that fits and makes our us feel like we are putting our best foot forward. Yet, how many clothes do we need? How many pairs of black pants can the closet hold? How many things have been bought with the wish that "someday they will fit..." yet someday hasn't come in years?
It's a worthy project to dedicate some time to clear the clutter, starting with something small and manageable like a closet or a desk. Set the timer for l5 minutes and do what you can. Do not leave the room. Designate a pile for stuff to keep, stuff to toss, stuff to donate. When the timer goes off, you can move on with your day. After enough of these 15 minute increments, the load will be much lighter. The sight lines will be cleaner, and the weight of storing extra stuff will be lifted.
I moved houses four weeks ago, I am still clearing out clutter. As I unpack boxes, I am tossing and donating car loads of things that I don't need and that I forgot I had. Clearly I had too much. It is making me feel like I have swept the cobwebs of my mind.
I have what I need. I have what I want. It is enough.
This theme is incredibly important with our eating as well. Of course it is connected. When I have what I need and what my body requires, and I make it enough, I am nourished and satisfied. This is a worthy pursuit.
The next time you sit down to a meal, prepare it well with yourself in mind. Take a look at your plate and appreciate the colors of your produce, the smells of your food and take the time to enjoy it. Relax and enjoy all of it, engaging all of your senses. Be aware that you are eating, nourishing, enjoying. Then move on with a clear and clean path to your day.
Tuesday, June 28, 2016
Tuesday, June 21, 2016
You are You: Watch Your Thoughts
The first book I think I ever read on the subject of positive thinking was called "The Little Engine that Could." We can all remember how this little engine was trying to get up over a big hill. The problem was clear. The engine was small, and the hill looked too big. But, after a bit of coaxing and encouragement from the passengers (clowns and dolls I think)--the little engine managed to climb up the hill, little by little by repeating the words "I think I can. I think I can." Once it got over the hill, the engine then said "I thought I could." This defines the power of POSITIVITY, which is simply the power of positive thinking and how it can affect and help create a desired outcome. First, we think something. Then, we repeat it to ourselves a few times or more. Then, we act on it
This is different from magical thinking. For example, just wishing I could win the lottery and move to Paris will not make it so. There are too many unknowns and outside forces to make that happen. Instead this is about exerting personal control in one's life which can create amazing outcomes.
Our thoughts are very powerful.
Let's keep this topic in mind when it comes to our bodies. A touchy subject if there ever was one. Some of us grew up with negative messages about body image. "You can't wear that...what were you thinking?" "You need to cover up...those arms look like bat wings." "Those pants are too tight." This is not helping cultivate a positive body image. Instead this is about shaming and saying that the body we got at birth, which is the body we live in today, which is the body we will die in, is somehow not good enough. Since we are not our bodies--our bodies are an extension of ourselves literally and figuratively, and since we carry it around wherever we go, it is up to us to cultivate a positive outlook. It is up to us to rewrite this negative storyboard and appreciate the body for what it can do, for how far it has come, for the children it may have produced, for the miles it has walked, for the arms that have hugged, for the mind that can be changed.
This is an important step on the path to self improvement. Discovering how we can positively adopt a healthy body image which then helps us make positive changes to preserve and promote that image is key. We do not want to spend our days thinking harsh, critical thoughts about a part of us that is so important. We do not want to listen to negative tapes that we create about what our bodies can and can't do. If you decide to climb a tree, then you can climb a tree. If you decide to walk 15,000 steps, then you can walk 15,000 steps.
We are not our bodies. We are not our minds. We are not our thoughts. We are not our feelings. We are that intangible vessel of greatness that came with us at birth. It is always there like a crystal that doesn't change color no matter what it comes into contact with. Unfortunately, as we grow up and have normal life experiences and listen to external messages, we can forget that what's deep down inside, what is good, is always there. The best of us is always there. It hasn't changed. It's been covered up.
Like the Little Engine that Could, we can too. Watch your thoughts. Watch what you say. Watch what you do. If you want more for yourself, go positive and appreciate the best in you. Always.
This is different from magical thinking. For example, just wishing I could win the lottery and move to Paris will not make it so. There are too many unknowns and outside forces to make that happen. Instead this is about exerting personal control in one's life which can create amazing outcomes.
Our thoughts are very powerful.
Let's keep this topic in mind when it comes to our bodies. A touchy subject if there ever was one. Some of us grew up with negative messages about body image. "You can't wear that...what were you thinking?" "You need to cover up...those arms look like bat wings." "Those pants are too tight." This is not helping cultivate a positive body image. Instead this is about shaming and saying that the body we got at birth, which is the body we live in today, which is the body we will die in, is somehow not good enough. Since we are not our bodies--our bodies are an extension of ourselves literally and figuratively, and since we carry it around wherever we go, it is up to us to cultivate a positive outlook. It is up to us to rewrite this negative storyboard and appreciate the body for what it can do, for how far it has come, for the children it may have produced, for the miles it has walked, for the arms that have hugged, for the mind that can be changed.
This is an important step on the path to self improvement. Discovering how we can positively adopt a healthy body image which then helps us make positive changes to preserve and promote that image is key. We do not want to spend our days thinking harsh, critical thoughts about a part of us that is so important. We do not want to listen to negative tapes that we create about what our bodies can and can't do. If you decide to climb a tree, then you can climb a tree. If you decide to walk 15,000 steps, then you can walk 15,000 steps.
We are not our bodies. We are not our minds. We are not our thoughts. We are not our feelings. We are that intangible vessel of greatness that came with us at birth. It is always there like a crystal that doesn't change color no matter what it comes into contact with. Unfortunately, as we grow up and have normal life experiences and listen to external messages, we can forget that what's deep down inside, what is good, is always there. The best of us is always there. It hasn't changed. It's been covered up.
Like the Little Engine that Could, we can too. Watch your thoughts. Watch what you say. Watch what you do. If you want more for yourself, go positive and appreciate the best in you. Always.
Monday, June 13, 2016
Increase the Fun: Increase the Fulfillment
There are many paths to happiness. At certain times in our lives, being busy and in demand by friends and family might make us happy. At other times, being quietly relaxed and home alone might restore calm and create its own solitary splendor. A certain flower or watching a movie or reading a book might bring happiness. Eating our favorite dinner on our birthday makes us feel happy and cared for. No matter how we define happiness, we know that being happy and/or content makes us feel good all over. We smile more often. We laugh out loud. We then attract more happiness and contentment to ourselves--while we send our happiness and contentment out to others.
One of the ways to balance our grand efforts at self improvement and sometimes self denial (limiting ice cream or lounging on the couch with to much tv) is with the non-food related things we enjoy, i.e. our bliss. Hobbies that don't involve food like gardening, fix-it jobs, biking, dog walking, studying World War II history, or taking bubble baths can lead us to a happy place where we are not even thinking about food to "fill us up."
With summer in full swing, now is the time to think like a kid and enjoy the great outdoors. Walking outside in bare feet, feeling the grass or sand under your toes is a reminder that simple pleasures can sometimes be the best. They are the ones we get to enjoy most often. They are often the ones we can always afford. Because we can't always go on an exotic vacation and leave our worries at home, it is important to cultivate these fulfilling activities, hobbies, interests, social connections in our every day life. I don't have to worry about reducing stress on vacation. That's easy. I do have to balance my time and my energies with my two jobs, my family, my household, my guy, my fitness program, etc.
Having more fun is one of my goals this summer. Being outside as much as possible is a big part of it. I am reading the paper outside under a huge maple tree in my front lawn while my dog, Pippa, sits in the grass and plays with her tennis ball. It's a happy moment for me and Pippa, while it is far removed from Mr. and Mrs. Cabinet who hang around my kitchen.
Taking time for fulfilling activities that make our lives worthwhile is of supreme importance. We don't ever want to cheat ourselves out of a fabulous life no matter where your mind or body is right now. We have to make ourselves an important priority and make sure we slow down long enough to enjoy the days as they unfold. By doing so, this will create a sense of balance and calm while contentment is soon to follow. Smiles abound, inside and out.
One of the ways to balance our grand efforts at self improvement and sometimes self denial (limiting ice cream or lounging on the couch with to much tv) is with the non-food related things we enjoy, i.e. our bliss. Hobbies that don't involve food like gardening, fix-it jobs, biking, dog walking, studying World War II history, or taking bubble baths can lead us to a happy place where we are not even thinking about food to "fill us up."
With summer in full swing, now is the time to think like a kid and enjoy the great outdoors. Walking outside in bare feet, feeling the grass or sand under your toes is a reminder that simple pleasures can sometimes be the best. They are the ones we get to enjoy most often. They are often the ones we can always afford. Because we can't always go on an exotic vacation and leave our worries at home, it is important to cultivate these fulfilling activities, hobbies, interests, social connections in our every day life. I don't have to worry about reducing stress on vacation. That's easy. I do have to balance my time and my energies with my two jobs, my family, my household, my guy, my fitness program, etc.
Having more fun is one of my goals this summer. Being outside as much as possible is a big part of it. I am reading the paper outside under a huge maple tree in my front lawn while my dog, Pippa, sits in the grass and plays with her tennis ball. It's a happy moment for me and Pippa, while it is far removed from Mr. and Mrs. Cabinet who hang around my kitchen.
Taking time for fulfilling activities that make our lives worthwhile is of supreme importance. We don't ever want to cheat ourselves out of a fabulous life no matter where your mind or body is right now. We have to make ourselves an important priority and make sure we slow down long enough to enjoy the days as they unfold. By doing so, this will create a sense of balance and calm while contentment is soon to follow. Smiles abound, inside and out.
Monday, June 6, 2016
A Meditation on Moving Houses and Yoga Training
It's been a wild two weeks in my life. I moved one four bedroom house with four people and a dog to another four bedroom house with four people and a dog--all of two miles away. This involved all of the packing and organizing and cleaning and decluttering as if I were moving across the country. As I watched the movers and myself lifting and relocating my earthly possessions, I started feeling weighted down by the load. I am not a hoarder, and I like getting rid of stuff, yet I still have more than I want to deal with.
Immediately after I moved to my new house, I had no time to unpack because I was attending an intensive four-day yoga training for nine hours per day. Unattachment is a big theme in yoga. It is a an eastern point of view that says we can free ourselves from anxiety--being too consumed by what might happen. We can free ourselves from regret over what happened that we have no control over. We can then be open to possibilities that we didn't even know exist. (simplified definition)
At my training, we also talked about the physical body--the one that so many of us are not happy with. This is the body that we are judgmental and critical of. We talked about the "subtle body" that has energy centers and nerve bundles that create tension or ease. It keeps going...to the point where we discussed that we are NOT OUR PHYSICAL BODIES. We are not our feelings. We are not our regrets. This was freeing for me to hear.
Of course, all of this made me reflect on the weight loss/self improvement journey. Are we burdened by the "stuff" of life that gets boxed up and relocated as we move from house to house? Are we lightening the load as we go and learn that it isn't stuff that makes a good life? Are we surrounding ourselves by what brings us joy and happiness? That can actually lighten the load--physically and otherwise. I also am thinking about how cumbersome and heavy it is to carry around things we don't need... like extra weight, judgment, criticism, expectation, comparisons, too much chocolate.
I will not be moving all of these boxes of stuff again. I will be eliminating even more clutter from my house and my life so that I can be free of what isn't helping me. I am going to be consciously asking myself the question when I eat--IS THIS HELPING ME? IS THIS NOURISHING? IS THIS WORTH IT?
Immediately after I moved to my new house, I had no time to unpack because I was attending an intensive four-day yoga training for nine hours per day. Unattachment is a big theme in yoga. It is a an eastern point of view that says we can free ourselves from anxiety--being too consumed by what might happen. We can free ourselves from regret over what happened that we have no control over. We can then be open to possibilities that we didn't even know exist. (simplified definition)
At my training, we also talked about the physical body--the one that so many of us are not happy with. This is the body that we are judgmental and critical of. We talked about the "subtle body" that has energy centers and nerve bundles that create tension or ease. It keeps going...to the point where we discussed that we are NOT OUR PHYSICAL BODIES. We are not our feelings. We are not our regrets. This was freeing for me to hear.
Of course, all of this made me reflect on the weight loss/self improvement journey. Are we burdened by the "stuff" of life that gets boxed up and relocated as we move from house to house? Are we lightening the load as we go and learn that it isn't stuff that makes a good life? Are we surrounding ourselves by what brings us joy and happiness? That can actually lighten the load--physically and otherwise. I also am thinking about how cumbersome and heavy it is to carry around things we don't need... like extra weight, judgment, criticism, expectation, comparisons, too much chocolate.
I will not be moving all of these boxes of stuff again. I will be eliminating even more clutter from my house and my life so that I can be free of what isn't helping me. I am going to be consciously asking myself the question when I eat--IS THIS HELPING ME? IS THIS NOURISHING? IS THIS WORTH IT?
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