Now that we are used to writing "2020" I have been hearing some people say that the new year hasn't really started yet for them. I get it. Sometimes we don't change with the stroke of midnight. Sometimes it takes a while to get into a groove. Maybe you aren't sure what you are hoping for in 2020? Maybe you are sick of being disappointed? Maybe you are frozen? Maybe you are one of the many who will give up your 2020 resolutions by January 17 (the day most people do give them up).
Firstly, there is no need to worry or obsess about this. If you aren't feeling like joining a gym, training for a marathon or investing in protein shakes while creating a minimalist life, it's ok. Being too ambitious is a surefire way to fail. It is tiny steps that count, because they add up, over tiny moments that add up to days, weeks, etc.
Secondly, consider what is making you happy in your present circumstances. Do you like your exercise routine? Do you like the people you go out with? Do you like your clothes? Do you like your job or your volunteer work? If any of these categories are giving you pause, then give yourself some time to wonder. You can't change others, but you can start brainstorming a change for yourself.
The frozen tundra months can feel like a drag, and January can sometimes feel like a let down after a busy holiday time. Spring break is not on the horizon yet. You are stuck inside a lot, with you! That's ok too. I am one of those people not feeling this new year/new you resolution hoopla. I'll be honest. I have lots of projects in the works that will be coming to fruition in 2020. I have my dream house being built that will be completed in 2020. I also have some itches that need to be scratched and some work projects to sort out in 2020, and I am not completely clear on that front yet. Still pondering. It's ok!
One thing I am sure of, and I must remind myself and you--is that when you are not feeling your greatest, or your most energetic or your most protein-powdered up--you are focusing on the wrong thing. ME TOO. Focus on your gifts, your assets, your goodness, your people, your service to others, your wonderful dog who loves you no matter what, and you will be rewarded with happiness. Focus on your shortcomings or icky feelings, and you will be punished with unhappiness. That is no one's resolution for any year. So, move over 2020. You just might have been evolving all along.
Sunday, January 12, 2020
Thursday, January 2, 2020
Your 2020
Now that the holiday season is over and 2019 is in the books, it is time to consider your successes, triumphs and challenges. If you could give yourself a report card for the year, how would you grade yourself? Were you following your dreams? Were you working diligently towards mini goals? Did you exercise discipline and sticktoitiveness? Did you embrace special moments? Did you get sidetracked by life circumstances? Did you get challenged by unforeseen events, people, timing? What might have held you back?
Be honest with your assessment. Give yourself the credit you are due, but also reflect on the sticky spots where you might have fallen short of your best intentions. This can go a long way in setting yourself up for future success. The game of life keeps playing. By gathering wisdom from the past, we can move forward with more power.
It is always worthwhile recommitting and refocusing on yourself. We are forever lifelong learners which is part of what makes life interesting. We will never know everything, read everything, see everything in the world. However, we can make the most of the enriching life experiences we do have the chance to take and the unplanned events we had no clue were coming our way.
This is the time to plan a fresh start by considering mini goals for the day or the week that will add up to bigger goals over time. Where would you like to be by February? Where would you like to be by spring break? What do you see yourself doing differently with your job, your house, your finances in that time frame? Start considering your options. Start charting your course by working backwards to now. At the very least, dream big because your big life depends on it.
Be honest with your assessment. Give yourself the credit you are due, but also reflect on the sticky spots where you might have fallen short of your best intentions. This can go a long way in setting yourself up for future success. The game of life keeps playing. By gathering wisdom from the past, we can move forward with more power.
It is always worthwhile recommitting and refocusing on yourself. We are forever lifelong learners which is part of what makes life interesting. We will never know everything, read everything, see everything in the world. However, we can make the most of the enriching life experiences we do have the chance to take and the unplanned events we had no clue were coming our way.
This is the time to plan a fresh start by considering mini goals for the day or the week that will add up to bigger goals over time. Where would you like to be by February? Where would you like to be by spring break? What do you see yourself doing differently with your job, your house, your finances in that time frame? Start considering your options. Start charting your course by working backwards to now. At the very least, dream big because your big life depends on it.
Thursday, December 19, 2019
Holiday Check in? How are You NOW?
In the flurry of holiday activities, let's come back to what is real. You are real. Your body is real. Your thoughts are real even if they aren't helpful. Your heartfelt wishes are real. Let's be clear. You are not your body or your thoughts or your wishes, but they do matter. In fact, they matter regardless of the day of the month, week or year.
With this point, consider what needs to happen for you to enjoy the last two weeks of this year. If holiday time is one of your favorite times, then this is easy. Pace yourself and keep going. If you are not quite into the festive spirit, now is the time to find things to appreciate. Maybe it something simple like looking at lights at night or enjoying a special tea and a good book or sitting in a hotel lobby amidst the hubbub. If this is NOT your favorite time for whatever reason--alternative Christmas, then your focus might be to just get through it. That's ok too. Get distracted. Maintain routine, and be kind to yourself. Time marches on either way.
Acknowledging how you are this time of year is very important. You don't have to be happy if you're not or excited if you're deflated or worried about finances. Not everyone is holding hands and singing carols around the Christmas tree. (As if!) I remember the Christmas when I was in the middle of my divorce, and soon to be ex husband was still living in the house. It was horrible. I couldn't even bring myself to send out cards, which I love to do. It was tough slogging, but I had to do it for my daughters, so I did. And, presto change-o we all got through it.
One thing everyone can do, right now, in this moment, which is where the power is--the present moment--is to give yourself the gift of self care awareness. You can, right now, take note of how you feel in your body--rested? fatigued? borderline ill? You can take note of how you feel in your mind--distracted? overwhelmed? contented? And you can take a good long look at what you hold dearly in your heart--the very best of you. What lies there? What are your heartfelt wishes for yourself? Consider what comes up even if it makes no sense. Sit with those things for a bit. If you feel that your heartfelt wishes are far away in the future, then acknowledge that it may be a process. If you feel that your heartfelt wishes are actually coming to you, be very appreciative of that too.
Wishing everyone a very merry Christmas, happy Chanukah however it pleases you.
With this point, consider what needs to happen for you to enjoy the last two weeks of this year. If holiday time is one of your favorite times, then this is easy. Pace yourself and keep going. If you are not quite into the festive spirit, now is the time to find things to appreciate. Maybe it something simple like looking at lights at night or enjoying a special tea and a good book or sitting in a hotel lobby amidst the hubbub. If this is NOT your favorite time for whatever reason--alternative Christmas, then your focus might be to just get through it. That's ok too. Get distracted. Maintain routine, and be kind to yourself. Time marches on either way.
Acknowledging how you are this time of year is very important. You don't have to be happy if you're not or excited if you're deflated or worried about finances. Not everyone is holding hands and singing carols around the Christmas tree. (As if!) I remember the Christmas when I was in the middle of my divorce, and soon to be ex husband was still living in the house. It was horrible. I couldn't even bring myself to send out cards, which I love to do. It was tough slogging, but I had to do it for my daughters, so I did. And, presto change-o we all got through it.
One thing everyone can do, right now, in this moment, which is where the power is--the present moment--is to give yourself the gift of self care awareness. You can, right now, take note of how you feel in your body--rested? fatigued? borderline ill? You can take note of how you feel in your mind--distracted? overwhelmed? contented? And you can take a good long look at what you hold dearly in your heart--the very best of you. What lies there? What are your heartfelt wishes for yourself? Consider what comes up even if it makes no sense. Sit with those things for a bit. If you feel that your heartfelt wishes are far away in the future, then acknowledge that it may be a process. If you feel that your heartfelt wishes are actually coming to you, be very appreciative of that too.
Wishing everyone a very merry Christmas, happy Chanukah however it pleases you.
Thursday, December 12, 2019
Plan B: Holiday Eating ReBoot
Every year when the holidays come around, there is excitement, nostalgia and sometimes dread at the thought of all that has to get done. Sometimes it is an nonevent because of unforeseen circumstances. No matter what, the pressure is on. The booze is flowing. The cookies are baking and trading. The pot lucks are often bad lucks. So much to do.
At the start of the season with the pumpkin spice turning to pepperminty, it all seems hopeful. However, after a few gatherings or unexpected pitfalls, it can become too much. I always hear by the end of the year--"I'm so glad it's over." Wait a second...it all began so well... but what an end. It doesn't have to be this way.
Imagining your best self showing up in the midst of a busy time of year, on top of your regular life including work, family, commuting, pets, laundry, bill paying, etc. might be too ambitious. So, instead of counting on your best self showing up, what about your best self in the moment showing up? What about pivoting and redirecting your attention where you really want it to go? This is not to say that planning how to handle a social event, dinner out or celebration is not a wise idea. This is to suggest that what if, by chance, you are thrown for a loop in the moment, and your best laid plan is not going to happen. Plan B is your new Plan A/change-a-roo.
Of course, in order to pivot in the moment, you have to be mindful of what is happening, what is being offered, where you position yourself in relation to food opportunities and how you are feeling. The power is always in the present moment. What if you are invited to a party that you have gone to for years, and every year they have served the same kind of healthy food. You have come to expect it, and this year, whoops--it's different. You were planning on that delicious relish tray with grilled veggies and shrimp cocktail, but instead, they are serving frozen cheesey hors d'oeuvres from Costco. YUM. But wait a minute, YUM but major calories from sat fat. Now you can pivot and rethink your options. What looks worthy of indulging in? Can you go and get more bubbly water first? Can you distance yourself from the food for a bit? Can you retreat and go to the restroom and look yourself in the mirror and say--Plan A/change-a-roo starts now?
There is no perfect plan. There is the human plan that gets carried out in very human situations. A healthier holiday plan is what we are looking for. This means that we don't get filled with regret over what happened. We don't have a gut bomb because we overdid it. We don't dread social gatherings because we can't control our impulses. We go to the events that appeal. We enjoy what we can--our friends, the catching up, the fun. We choose mindfully. Afterwards, consider how things went. Do you like what happened? Do you like your pivot? Then, gather wisdom from that experience and use it the next time.
Holly jolly, jingle jangle, ho ho ho and merry berry. If you want it to be. Calm, control, peace, joy. If you want it to be. A little of both. You decide. Then embrace your choices.
At the start of the season with the pumpkin spice turning to pepperminty, it all seems hopeful. However, after a few gatherings or unexpected pitfalls, it can become too much. I always hear by the end of the year--"I'm so glad it's over." Wait a second...it all began so well... but what an end. It doesn't have to be this way.
Imagining your best self showing up in the midst of a busy time of year, on top of your regular life including work, family, commuting, pets, laundry, bill paying, etc. might be too ambitious. So, instead of counting on your best self showing up, what about your best self in the moment showing up? What about pivoting and redirecting your attention where you really want it to go? This is not to say that planning how to handle a social event, dinner out or celebration is not a wise idea. This is to suggest that what if, by chance, you are thrown for a loop in the moment, and your best laid plan is not going to happen. Plan B is your new Plan A/change-a-roo.
Of course, in order to pivot in the moment, you have to be mindful of what is happening, what is being offered, where you position yourself in relation to food opportunities and how you are feeling. The power is always in the present moment. What if you are invited to a party that you have gone to for years, and every year they have served the same kind of healthy food. You have come to expect it, and this year, whoops--it's different. You were planning on that delicious relish tray with grilled veggies and shrimp cocktail, but instead, they are serving frozen cheesey hors d'oeuvres from Costco. YUM. But wait a minute, YUM but major calories from sat fat. Now you can pivot and rethink your options. What looks worthy of indulging in? Can you go and get more bubbly water first? Can you distance yourself from the food for a bit? Can you retreat and go to the restroom and look yourself in the mirror and say--Plan A/change-a-roo starts now?
There is no perfect plan. There is the human plan that gets carried out in very human situations. A healthier holiday plan is what we are looking for. This means that we don't get filled with regret over what happened. We don't have a gut bomb because we overdid it. We don't dread social gatherings because we can't control our impulses. We go to the events that appeal. We enjoy what we can--our friends, the catching up, the fun. We choose mindfully. Afterwards, consider how things went. Do you like what happened? Do you like your pivot? Then, gather wisdom from that experience and use it the next time.
Holly jolly, jingle jangle, ho ho ho and merry berry. If you want it to be. Calm, control, peace, joy. If you want it to be. A little of both. You decide. Then embrace your choices.
Tuesday, December 3, 2019
Bounce Back with Healthy Fuel
With Thanksgiving in the rear view mirror, we now turn our attention to December and all that it brings. Staying focused on your routine and keeping your schedule as normal as possible are great ways to approach this busy time.
Start the day off right with a healthy breakfast so that your body and mind are prepared for more good things to come. Fuel the day with protein, healthy carbs and a healthy fat. This will give you energy to do your work plus a little boost in case someone walks in with donuts. Speaking of those unexpected treats... decide if and when you are going to indulge, and then enjoy. Every treat that comes your way, however, is not yours. Some of this "found food" is worthy of you, while some is simply not.
Drink lots of water no matter the weather. Staying hydrated so that your body works better is critical. At home, set up a nice pitcher of spa water on your kitchen counter. Every time you see it, take another drink. You can add peeled cucumber and limes or lemons and oranges or mint leaves and cucumber--whatever you like. It's fun to look at. It's a twist on regular water. It can remind you to drink more water.
Plan ahead for parties and pot lucks. Decide in advance which parties are worth eating at. This week I have three Christmas parties in a row. Two of these parties I have been to before, and while they have great holiday foods at both, I can easily eat before I go and have seltzer water when I am there. The other party--that's at a hotel with fun programming and a dessert reception and... I don't know what else, but that's where I am planning to try some new things. As for pot lucks, if you don't have to go, then maybe you skip. Not every gathering may be worthy of your time and effort. In that case, bypass the pot luck/bad luck buffet and eat as you normally would.
Keep your activity going. If you take a regular yoga class or walk with a friend, don't stop now. Your body and mind will thank you for these precious breaks.
Stocking the refrigerator with healthy foods, lots of cut up fruits and vegetables that are grab and go will help keep you on track. Heavy holiday foods interfere with your digestion, energy and motivation. Bounce back by eating your regular foods.
Staying focused and on track is a challenge oftentimes, and at holiday time, the struggle is real. You can be stronger than the struggle. You can decide that even if today didn't go as well as you would have liked, you will bounce back by doing the next right thing. The power is in the doing. The power is in you.
Start the day off right with a healthy breakfast so that your body and mind are prepared for more good things to come. Fuel the day with protein, healthy carbs and a healthy fat. This will give you energy to do your work plus a little boost in case someone walks in with donuts. Speaking of those unexpected treats... decide if and when you are going to indulge, and then enjoy. Every treat that comes your way, however, is not yours. Some of this "found food" is worthy of you, while some is simply not.
Drink lots of water no matter the weather. Staying hydrated so that your body works better is critical. At home, set up a nice pitcher of spa water on your kitchen counter. Every time you see it, take another drink. You can add peeled cucumber and limes or lemons and oranges or mint leaves and cucumber--whatever you like. It's fun to look at. It's a twist on regular water. It can remind you to drink more water.
Plan ahead for parties and pot lucks. Decide in advance which parties are worth eating at. This week I have three Christmas parties in a row. Two of these parties I have been to before, and while they have great holiday foods at both, I can easily eat before I go and have seltzer water when I am there. The other party--that's at a hotel with fun programming and a dessert reception and... I don't know what else, but that's where I am planning to try some new things. As for pot lucks, if you don't have to go, then maybe you skip. Not every gathering may be worthy of your time and effort. In that case, bypass the pot luck/bad luck buffet and eat as you normally would.
Keep your activity going. If you take a regular yoga class or walk with a friend, don't stop now. Your body and mind will thank you for these precious breaks.
Stocking the refrigerator with healthy foods, lots of cut up fruits and vegetables that are grab and go will help keep you on track. Heavy holiday foods interfere with your digestion, energy and motivation. Bounce back by eating your regular foods.
Staying focused and on track is a challenge oftentimes, and at holiday time, the struggle is real. You can be stronger than the struggle. You can decide that even if today didn't go as well as you would have liked, you will bounce back by doing the next right thing. The power is in the doing. The power is in you.
Thursday, November 21, 2019
Self Care Aware
My recommendation and mantra for holiday time is be SELF CARE AWARE. Repeat this to yourself as often as you need to so that you are aware of how you are feeling and doing. For example, how hungry are you..how tired are you...how energized are you...how stressed are you? And then, depending on your answers, respond to your body's signals and your mind's answers accordingly. Slow down to notice.
This is the time of year with so much distraction, that it can be challenging to remember to slow down in the first place. However, checking in with yourself is one of the best gifts you can give yourself. By being self care aware, you can make good use of your coping skills, your self regulating skills and your self preservation skills. This will lead to more peacefulness and more calm whether you are at the grocery store with a crowd of people checking their lists or whether you are in a frenzied mall where people are pushing and rushing, or even worse--you are bothered by your own thoughts about getting it all done in time.
Can there be a nice balance between being social and engaging and just relaxing and enjoying? For me, I can't relax until my holiday cards are done. I love doing them, but this year--there is NO photo which is something I always have on my cards. I am still not sure how I will resolve this. Yet, I have decided I am not going to stress myself about it. My baby girls are 21 and 18 at this point.
It sounds like I have jumped straight to Christmas and forgotten Thanksgiving. No, I have not. I just realized that Christmas is about a month away, so I have a lot to do. First things first--our November holiday of thanks, gratitude for health, happiness, our treasured friends and loving family, our pets...It's not all perfect, of course not. (I can't tell you how many lies I have to stomach at my house.) However, take your health away, and there is nothing. Take your loved ones away, and there is grief. Take your friendships away, and there is loneliness that no one deserves. Take my Pippa away... oh don't even go there.
The most precious gratitude is for what you have that cannot be bought. Make a list of those things and be very appreciative...spend time with them and give them your full attention. Be self care aware. Enjoy doing it, after all you too are a gift.
This is the time of year with so much distraction, that it can be challenging to remember to slow down in the first place. However, checking in with yourself is one of the best gifts you can give yourself. By being self care aware, you can make good use of your coping skills, your self regulating skills and your self preservation skills. This will lead to more peacefulness and more calm whether you are at the grocery store with a crowd of people checking their lists or whether you are in a frenzied mall where people are pushing and rushing, or even worse--you are bothered by your own thoughts about getting it all done in time.
Can there be a nice balance between being social and engaging and just relaxing and enjoying? For me, I can't relax until my holiday cards are done. I love doing them, but this year--there is NO photo which is something I always have on my cards. I am still not sure how I will resolve this. Yet, I have decided I am not going to stress myself about it. My baby girls are 21 and 18 at this point.
It sounds like I have jumped straight to Christmas and forgotten Thanksgiving. No, I have not. I just realized that Christmas is about a month away, so I have a lot to do. First things first--our November holiday of thanks, gratitude for health, happiness, our treasured friends and loving family, our pets...It's not all perfect, of course not. (I can't tell you how many lies I have to stomach at my house.) However, take your health away, and there is nothing. Take your loved ones away, and there is grief. Take your friendships away, and there is loneliness that no one deserves. Take my Pippa away... oh don't even go there.
The most precious gratitude is for what you have that cannot be bought. Make a list of those things and be very appreciative...spend time with them and give them your full attention. Be self care aware. Enjoy doing it, after all you too are a gift.
Thursday, November 14, 2019
Try Something New If...
When things are going well, there's no real reason to make a change. Just ride the wave! But, when your routine starts getting boring, or your habits are not helping you anymore, it might be time to try something new.
Whether it's with your eating, your exercising, your hobbies or even your job--you can always pivot a little or a lot to get something more than what you have presently.
This week in WW, we rolled out a program innovation, "MY WW" so that for the first time ever there are three healthy ways to work it. If you are happy with what's happening now, however, stay where you are. If you would like to explore another option, take a chance on you and see what results you get.
At the very least, remember that the best eating plan for you is the one that you can sustain over the long term. Your healthy lifestyle is a long term commitment.
You are never stuck. Not in your eating. Not in your mind. Not in your relationships. Not in your job. Embrace something new this week, and take the best gamble ever--the one where you win no matter what.
Whether it's with your eating, your exercising, your hobbies or even your job--you can always pivot a little or a lot to get something more than what you have presently.
This week in WW, we rolled out a program innovation, "MY WW" so that for the first time ever there are three healthy ways to work it. If you are happy with what's happening now, however, stay where you are. If you would like to explore another option, take a chance on you and see what results you get.
At the very least, remember that the best eating plan for you is the one that you can sustain over the long term. Your healthy lifestyle is a long term commitment.
You are never stuck. Not in your eating. Not in your mind. Not in your relationships. Not in your job. Embrace something new this week, and take the best gamble ever--the one where you win no matter what.
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