Get Back to Basics

When life becomes overwhelming, and it's hard to focus, that is precisely the time to return to the basics, to keep it simple and real.  When it comes to food, that means start with the food groups which are:  fruits, veggies, whole grains, lean protein and protein substitutes, dairy and dairy substitutes and healthy oils. The single ingredient foods from these groups are the most nutrient dense, filling, healthy and low in calories, sugar, saturated fat and sodium.  A balance of the food groups creates satisfied eating, improves the chance for weight loss, reduces cravings for sugar and aids digestion.

Food has long been valued for its medicinal properties.  For example, in traditional Chinese medicine, depending on the ailment and the organ, there is a corresponding food to consume to create healing and balance.  Fast forward thousands of years, to my own childhood when my grandmother called chicken noodle soup "Jewish penicillin."  We aren't Jewish, but the soothing comfort of hot soup that is simple and satisfying no matter what religion you are can do the trick.  This is another version of going back to basics, i.e. what is simple is what will often work best.

Over the years, the science of weight loss and nutrition has evolved.  So has our eating.  We know things now that we had no clue about before.  My grandfather was a diabetic.  In the 70's, he was given a baked potato instead of french fries because that was thought to be healthier for a diabetic.  The fact is that while the baked potato wasn't fried, it had just as many carbs as the french fries and was not really any "healthier" for a diabetic.

More recently, there has been a major misunderstanding about cholesterol.  We all have good cholesterol and "bad" cholesterol in our system.  Certain foods are known to add to the "bad" cholesterol--namely saturated fats.  We now know that the overconsumption of saturated fat (and sugar) is the leading cause of obesity in the world not cholesterol.

Moderation in all things--including moderation itself is the key.  The sweet spot in our eating comes from choosing mostly healthy foods most of the time with a dash of extras thrown in to keep us interested and satisfied.  By filling up on the basic food groups, our bodies get what they want and need--fuel.  By adding in a few treats now and then, our minds get what they want--something more exciting.  By finding a balance, we enjoy life more fully.  This is the "sweetest" spot of all.

Where Does Time Go

We all have the same twenty-four hours in a day.  Some days it feels like the day is just flying by--in a good way.  Other days, it feels like the day is barely moving--in a bad way.  When we are engaged in activities that please us, with people we enjoy, our impression is that time is moving too fast.  When we are unhappy or dealing with difficult jobs or waiting in the emergency room with someone very ill, our impression is that time is crawling.  

How we value our time is another aspect of how we perceive its passing.  For some, time IS money.  

Those people are not "wasting" their time on things that aren't financially profitable.  On the other hand, there is a book titled "Your Money or Your Time" meaning what do you value more?   Perception is reality.  We get to decide.

As adults, we have so many responsibilities from work, family activities, house projects, financial obligations, self care--it leaves little time for sleep, fun, hobbies or entertainment.  However, we all benefit from seeking and creating a more balanced distribution of our time.  That means that more often than not, we find time to balance our responsibilities with a burst of "ME TIME" with no guilt attached. Even a ten minute walk without the pressure of answering the phone can refine the day. Going to bed, although there is laundry to do, might also serve to add balance.  Eliminating time wasters like too much social media can also help reclaim valuable "ME TIME."

Creating balance allows us to de-stress.   In the technology age, we suffer from chronic stress that keeps cortisol flowing.  Cortisol makes us crave junky foods, store fat around the middle and experience more ailments, viruses, depression and anxiety.  We owe it to ourselves to look at our priorities and make sure that we place high value on "ME TIME."  In doing so, we bring the powerful and restorative good energy back to where it belongs.  We feel better.  We become more positive.  We didn't gain more time, but we did redistribute it more effectively.  That counts.

Self improvement takes focus, desire, effort and precious time.  Make time so that you can succeed at what you prioritize this week.  

We All Need Reasons

When we hear self improvement advice, it often sounds great, and in fact, we can't really argue with it. Drink more water.  Go to bed earlier at night.  Take the stairs.  Eat half at restaurants. Call your mother. The list goes on.  The problem comes from the fact that we can't do everything all the time.  That's not reasonable.  We only have so much energy to give.  There is only so much time.  We have to concentrate our efforts towards the things that matter most.

Therein lies the issue.  What matters most?  What deserves our attention now?  What will really please us?  It comes down to our own personal desires.  With weight loss and behavior change, we need to keep digging deep to find reasons to keep going.  We need to find worthwhile reasons that really matter to NOT have two glasses of wine when everyone else seems to be.  We need to find compelling reasons to get up early to exercise or to stay late to exercise or to skip lunch with coworkers to exercise. It comes down to how we want to live.  These reasons don't have to be the same every day or even moment to moment.  In fact, sometimes when we feel really defeated, the only reason we can find to keep going is that we refuse to give up. That's a great reason.

Refuse to give up on yourself.  Refuse to settle for less than what you really want just because it might be taking a while to get there.  Refuse to be distracted by everyone else's needs instead of considering your own.

Refuse to give up.  That's your reason.

Shift Your Mindset by Leading with the Heart

A big part of improving performance, changing behavior, achieving goals and persisting comes from what's in the heart.  The heart is true unto itself.  It doesn't have to defend.  It doesn't have to make sense--like emotions--it can just be what it is.  The mind, on the other hand, is the governor of actions. The mind can be rational and can listen to the truth coming from the heart.  The body eavesdrops on the mind.  The body will follow the intention of the mind if at all possible.  This is why we hear--if you think you can, you are right; if you think you can't, you're right too.  It's the will of the mind at work.

Of course, there are things that we have to do in the course of the day, week, month, year that might have nothing to do with what is in the heart.  We don't want to be home sick (that's the body's way of talking and saying: REST).  We don't want to do certain jobs at work or home because we don't like them (counting inventory and cleaning bathrooms for me).   We don't want to be stuck in traffic.  But, that's just part of living life.  We do those things and benefit from making the most of them because they make life work better.  It's part of the deal.  

We all know, in our mind, that we should eat less, move more, drink lots of water, consume less sugar, saturated fat and alcohol.  Knowing this in the mind, is not enough to make it happen though.  We have to dig deeper than that.  By digging deeper we get down to what we really want.  Here comes the heart. Then the body can follow.  It sounds easy, but of course, there are multitudinous barriers to success. People, stress, workload, unexpected obstacles, traffic, illness, fatigue, lack of enthusiasm and negative self talk get in the way.  That's why it is so important to be sure the mind is set straight.  The body is listening and will follow along.

This is the week to SHIFT the mindset and see what might happen.  Pay attention to what the mind is meditating on.  95% of our thoughts are actually the same ones we had yesterday.  How boring.  Let's create a shift.  I admit, there is an element of fear in actually getting what you want.  I agree, there is an element of fear in not ever getting what you want.  There is misery in never even trying.  

Lead with the heart.

Govern with the mind.

Listen to the body and see what it can do.

We Need Feedback From Our Tribe

I park in an underground parking garage one day a week for an early morning Weight Watchers meeting downtown in Minneapolis.  I have been doing this for about six months.  The same parking attendant, Dan, has been there nearly every single week.  He is a smiling, friendly presence every time. This week he approached me as I was leaving and asked me if I would sign his birthday card.  He said it was it was his birthday yesterday, and he likes his friends to sign his cards because he saves them and reads them by the fireplace.  He said his wife thinks he is crazy, but this means something to him.

You couldn't have surprised me more.  I have never had anyone ask me to sign their own birthday card. I wrote a note on the back (the inside of the card was full) telling Dan that I appreciate his smile and his friendly demeanor, etc.

An hour later, I was teaching yoga.  At the end of class I usually read a quote or short affirmation from a book.  As usual, I did that, and then two yogis came up to me to take a photo of the book and the affirmation.  They explained to me that this really spoke to them.  One lady explained that she puts a positive quote on the chalkboard in her kitchen every week.  Friends of hers look for it when they visit. I shared the story of Dan and the birthday card.  They said--yes, they too need affirmation and encouragement.

These were two hot strikes in the space of an hour.  It is not a coincidence.  I thought more about this, and this desire to be connected is universal.  We all need feedback, affirmation, something good to meditate on, something worthwhile to reflect over.  Dan asked for it.  In doing so, I learned he has a wife.  I learned that he thinks of me as a friend.  I learned that he is vulnerable and courageous enough to ask for what he needs.

As children, we get regular feedback from parents through guidance and discipline and support.  Our teachers do it too.  We get progress reports, report cards and graduations to the next grade every year. As adults, we don't get consistent feedback because our jobs and relationships aren't tailored the same way.  Yet, we need it just as much.  We thrive on it.  We need to be reminded in the course of a busy day, year, career, adult life that we have defining qualities that attract others to us.  We have characteristics that make us who we are, and we desire recognition and occasional appreciation.

No man or woman is an island.  We need others to keep going.  It makes life worth living and gives us what we need to make the most of our lives.  As we work to improve our health, reduce excess weight and create balance, we can ask for what we want.  We can use that feedback to make us stronger.  We can continue to set the bar high knowing we are not alone.  We never were.

Review Yourself to Stay Accountable

Honesty is a big part of being accountable.  We are often aware of our behavior and the consequences--what we know works and what doesn't.  That's not necessarily enough to keep us on track with personal and professional goals, but it is a starting point.  We are the expert on ourselves.  We live with our thoughts and feelings all day and night.   For this reason, we can evaluate how we are doing--and make appropriate changes to get what we really want.

Unfortunately, sometimes we stand in our own way.  We let ourselves off the hook and simply don't "show up" for what we know is right.  Stress, conflicting demands and other struggles get in our path. That's to be expected because life can be unpredictable.  It is not the end of the road, however it is a temporary set-back to learn from--regroup from--and move on from.

It all comes back to our accountability to ourselves.  It is our wishes, goals and dreams that motivate us to do anything, especially the worthwhile things.  Weight loss is one thing that we never seem to give up on even when it isn't going well.  We may give up on it temporarily, but once we made the decision to lose weight, we won't ever be entirely happy until we reach that goal.  

Consider what you know about yourself, your habits and your honesty.  Give yourself feedback on how you are doing now.  Are you on the right path to getting what you want?  Are you making yourself do the things that you know will help you?  Are you reaching out to others who might be partners sharing the same path?  

If so, keep going.  If not, straighten up and start being more accountable to you.  You deserve to get what you want, but you have to work for it, one day at a time--starting now.

Seasons Change and So Do We

My nineteen year old daughter just started her sophomore year of college in New York today.  My sixteen year old daughter just started her junior year of high school in Minnesota today.  I was posting their "first day" photos on facebook, and it got me thinking about where did the time go?  How could it have passed so quickly?

Of course, time didn't disappear without my knowing it.  My girls started out in prekindergarten and then grade school and then middle school and then high school.  I remember all of those "firsts"--especially the first time I dropped off my older daughter without taking her into the building.  It didn't feel right.  Up until that point, I had walked her in to every new situation of her life.

My daughters are not the only ones who have been changing over these years.  So have I.  Every seven years, all of the cells in the body are renewed and replaced.  That's major change at the most basic level. My thinking has changed over the years too.  Things I wanted before and felt were important look different to me now.  I have had more experiences to shape my opinions.   I have had successes and disappointments.  I have wanted things that have never come to pass.  I have achieved other things that I never saw coming my way.  Haven't we all?

Just like the seasons, we too are part of the natural landscape.  We are ending the season of vitality, the season of feeling good in our own skin, moving around easily, the season of the sun.  We are gradually shifting to the season of letting go, breathing deeply and exhaling even more deeply to release what we don't need.

No matter how old we are--we can all be excited about the start of something new.  Maybe you don't have a new backpack or school shoes, but you have a new lease on your personal goals and heart's desire.  Maybe you have an appreciation for where you have been and can look at the future with enthusiasm.  Maybe you are just ready to be done with summer and its spontaneous entertaining and reckless eating.

It is time to reflect for a moment and consider what we wish to carry with us from the summer.  What has happened that has worked?  What has happened that got us no where?  We can then shift our thinking to the future and what we'd like to have happen this fall.   It is time to shift to more accountability and more success, a change for the better.